Critical acclaim for Otter Zen

Want to review Otter Zen? Why?

"You suck. I came here to see otters." 

"Why don't you have anything about otters? I'm really disappointed. I thought this was an otter site."

"Stop blogging or I will cut out your eyes."

"Dude, an otter is a thin gay bear. Seriously."

"Your life will be worthwhile if your penis grows a little."